My Coworker’s Life Is Falling Apart and He’s Taking It Out on Everyone

Inc.com columnist and emotional intelligence coach Justin Bariso answers workplace questions with an emotional element—everything from how to deal with a grumpy coworker how to know when to leave your job.

Dear Justin,

I’m transitioning into a role with a new manager. I work with a guy whose marriage and general life outside of work is falling apart. He doesn’t do well with following directions and tends to be moody and just short of wanting to take over. If something doesn’t go his way, he shows it immediately through his attitude and body language, sometimes without saying much.

What are some tips to addressing this issue, coming across clearly with directions, and helping him improve his performance without mowing him over as a person?

Janet

Hey Janet,

This is a challenging situation, and sorry you’re going through it. The way you handle it depends much on your current relationship with your colleague and the level of trust that’s already been established. Of course, empathy goes a long way in situations like this: The more you can understand and relate to what he’s going through, the more he’ll feel you care and the more open he’ll be to your direction at work.